God,Nature,Cosmos and Love

LOVE IS THE ESSENCE OF OUR EXISTENCE

All of us are born in World with a Wound in Our heart, emptiness, an empty Cup of Wine.

This emptiness of heart is motive beyond every Human activity- Science, Religion, Art, Music, Social Action, Politics, Spiritualism, Insanity and Crime.

This Empty Cup can only be filled with Wine of Love. Those who are able to do it they build their Paradise. Most of the people try to fill this by amassing Wealth, subjugating others and indulging in carnal pleasures. The fire of Arrogance, Hatred, Prejudice and Bigotry ignites in their hearts and the Hell they build for themselves.

Our proud in our Knowledge and Technological Advancements

In our Civilization, we have achieved tremendous success in field of Transport, Communication, automation, in tapping of Energy, and in controlling the environment for our comfort.

There have been many Civilizations in the past and we find ruins of some of these. There advancements at those times is very intriguing for us and we fail to understand how those things were formed.

Individually, all of us are so inadequate and so clumsy in our day to day affairs that it seems miraculous how we achieved such Technological success ?

Suppose there is a 7 storey building and on top of it is a pillar and a boy of 10 years wants to strike that pillar by throwing a ball from the ground. Now when he attempts he fails as the ball just does not go above second storey. Now this boy thinks that as there are 7 storeys and so if I rotate my hand 7 times in a circle and then throw the ball then it must strike the pillar, one circle for one storey. The boy does so and succeeds.

Thus it appears that when human beings make some theory or system and want to achieve some success, the Nature grants success through that theory or system and that theory or system appears TRUE.

We have our theories and systems, ancients were having their own theories and systems and both were rewarded Success in their endeavours by Nature.

Whatever Creative activity we do as in Science, Philosophy, Arts, Music, Social Work, Politics, if we remain tuned then new and new Ideas and Images continue to pour in as when we tune our radio or select channel in TV, the programmes related to concerned station or channel start coming.

Despite great Technological Advancements and despite huge accumulated knowledge in form of books, libraries and now on the Web, we are just in infancy in matters of knowing.

We do not know everything about anything say about water, iron, lily plant or a sparrow. We are not able to say anything intelligible about Time, Space, Matter, Energy or Light.

There are levels below levels, levels above levels and horizons beyond horizons.

Sometimes we observe the world, take the clue and invent something as James Watt

found power inherent in steam and the Steam Engine was invented.

Sometimes we invented something and on its homology we can understand the World.

The Computer and the Internet afford such possibilities.

In a working Computer there are three units working separately and interrelated.

1.User

2.Operating System

3.Hard ware

Most of the Users don’t know and need not know any details about Operating System and Hard Ware but Operating System makes it possible for them to do all they need on Computer and the Internet.

Similarly, all the Conscious animals are using their bodies and keeping themselves surviving as some in-between their Consciousness and their bodies keep them capable.

What is this Operating System like thing in every Conscious animal and in ourselves. I had coined the word ENCON- an interface between Energy and Consciousness. Our nervous system works using chemical and electrical energy and this ENCON inter-plays between the signals from energy generated by living nervous system and the Consciousness associated with that individual.

Now, at the level of man and animal :

1 User is the Consciousness of animal or man

2 Operating System is ENCON

3 Hard ware is Body

Whether we walk, speak, recollect or sleep, we don’t know or have access to parts of brain, nerves and muscles making all this possible. We just intend and this Encon makes it possible to perform these actions.

And at the level of Infinity is

1. User all prevailing Consciousness, known to mankind as God, either wrongly believed or disbelieved.

2. Operating System is Nature

3. Hard ware is whole Cosmos.

There is all prevailing Consciousness. When in an embryo, the nervous system develops and sends signals as a result of electrical and chemical energy produced by the nervous system , a portion of Consciousness gets attached to it- thus an individual consciousness is produced and it remains throughout life of individual- man or animal and gets liberated at time of death.

Thus it is possible that Individuality/Personality of each animal or man gets imprinted in life-time and then sets free after death of physical body.

Now the nervous system, and the Encon that is going to be coupled with it on receiving signals from it and the Consciousness that is going to take control, all these units may be uniquely pre-determined for each individual. May be so.

Encon enters into every cell of body and takes control and may be that Consciousness also permeates each Cell of body.

Now we must understand that ENCON and NATURE are same things at same level and both influence the body and the Cosmos and both are affected by Consciousness - whether divine or human.

Thus all the evils, mishaps, abortions, disasters are because of Evil in Human Consciousness. Where men do some wrong, Nature also follows the suite and some Disaster takes place.

The devouring of one type of animals by other animals in Nature is also because of some faults of human beings- this devouring was perhaps meant for dead or for those animals dying and are in pain, agony and suffering and this liberates them and keeps Environment clean.

SCIENTIFIC THOUGHTS

The question before us is

1. How this Cosmos came into existence
2. How we came into being

The Science presents Big Bang Theory as answer to first and Theory of Evolution as answer to second question.

The most important point to consider is whether all this happened by itself, by mere chance or there was some Direction, some Conscious Agency directing all this to happen and whether we find such Direction in Cosmos and in our day-to-day happenings.

Our mind can not comprehend how something can come into existence out of Nothingness. We will have to consider some pre-existing cloud, liquid or some solid to begin with.

So it is thought that all Matter was condensed into a small ball- a Singularity. The Cosmos started with an explosion- a Big Bang. Thus metagalaxies were formed and then galaxies and stars were formed.

Analysis of Big Bang Theory

Now the question arises how Space entered between Molecules, between Atoms and within Atoms between micro-particles when there was a Singularity meaning no space in between at the beginning?

Either we suppose that explosions continued till Molecules got separated from Molecules, Atoms got separated from Atoms and micro-particles got separated from micro-particles.

Or we suppose that initially micro-particles were formed having space all around and then these were compressed into a Singularity then released or scattered all around.

Again one Big Bang does not explain multiple centres of Orbital motions and multiple Orbits in Cosmos.

The arms of Galaxies suggest to me that initially Matter was in a form of Ocean of micro-particles with Space in between and it was churned and so the spinning Galaxies came out of it.

Probabilities along with Singularity

Now if existence of Singularity was mere co-incidence then there must be multiple Singularities- some still unexploded, some exploded but not expanded, some exploded, expanded but reverted and so on.

Time,Space and Cosmos

Though we can not define clearly but we believe in existence of Time, Space and Cosmos(Matter)

Probabilities along with Time,Space and Cosmos

1. Time alone, no Space, no Cosmos
2. Space alone no Time, no Cosmos
3. Cosmos alone, np Time,no Space
4. Time and Space,no Cosmos
5. Time and Cosmos, no Space
6. Space and Cosmos, no Time
7. Time, Space and Cosmos

Thus out of 7 probabilities we have one last reality.

Historically, first probability 1 may have been Reality then Probability 4 became Reality and then Probability 7 became Reality.

It is quite possible that if Cosmos had been in Stage of Singularity- a small ball then it may be rotating, moving to and fro or falling to one side and no ground to refute existence of Time and Space beyond Cosmos.

Even it is proposed in Modern Science that Expansion and re-Contraction of Cosmos may be Cyclic. If so then there will be Specific Time and Space of each Cycle and a Total Time and Space of all Cycles and inter-phase when Singularity remained dormant in between ant two Cycles..

Modern Physics asserts that Time and Space came into existence along with Big Bang- there were no Time and Space before Big Bang.

This is not a bona-fide assertion. There is no ground to make such assertion as shown above. The Copernican System of Earth’s motion round the Sun is one of the basic assertion of Science and it remained main tussle between Science and Church and finally Church withdrew and Science became name of Truth

and reason.

Michelson Morley Experiment was performed in 1881. If Earth is getting displaced with velocity of 30 Km./Second in Absolute Space then the fringes should have been shifted. The NULL result of Michelson Morley Experiment shook this very foundation of Modern Science. The people at that time, could not think any other solution and so Absolute Time and Absolute Space were denied.

See my paper Fallacies of Special Theory of Relativity and Alternative Explanation of NULL result of Michelson Morley Experimrnt in last pages of this book. I presented my views in 1987 in 74^th session of Indian Science Congress Association at Bangalore. Its abstract published in Proceedings of Physics Section. Nobody understood and no journal is going to publish such views.

Existence by Chance

If Existence is by mere Chance then Non-Existence merits more probability because if something came into existence, it will not continue to exist. For example, if blowing wind could raise some shape from sand then next moment it will scatter away.

And if Spontaneous Existence be a frequent occurrence then we will continue to find strange objects in sky and in our neighbourhood that our life will turn into a nightmare.

If Existence be just incidental then we will not find Order, Arrangement and Symmetry. But if we find Wisdom and Beauty then it signifies that there is some Creator whose Wisdom and Aesthetics is getting expressed. And this is exactly what we find everywhere and at every level of Observation- be it Microscope, Electron Microscope or pictures from Hubble Telescope.

If there be some spots on a wall then it may be incidental but if some picture is painted on it or something written on it, even if it be in some code then it can not be by itself. There is a unique genetic code same in cells of that particular individual. All the species of plants and animals have their genetic code different from other species. The two individuals of same species have some differences. Only identical twins have same genetic code because they are borne from same egg.

This Code governs growth and development of each cell, each organ, and each part and of whole individual. Whole morphology, anatomy and physiology of individual is governed by this code and also healing, recovery from injury and disease and also the life-span.

This Code winds, unwinds or read in such a way that Cell in one stage of development is transformed into cell of next stage of development. The sprouting, branching, coming out of limb-bud, extension of blood vessels and nerves and formation of bones, joints, muscles and skin of developing limb-bud are directed by this code. Is this Wisdom in such a microscopic scale possible without some Conscious Wise Direction?

Stability in Cosmos

We in our day to day life find that whatever we build it soon disintegrates- all turn into rubbish and ruins. We have to take care, to clean, to mend continuously. And whatever we make neither it improves and evolves with Time and nor it multiplies by itself in due course of Time.

Thus how Sun, Moon, Earth and Stars are maintained agelessly without some Care and Maintenance ?

When Life had been probable ?

If there had been suitable conditions for life in million of earths.

Then there had been origin of life in thousands of them and had continued in hundreds of them.

Then there had been vegetations in 50 to 60 of them.

Animals in 10 to 20 of them at various stages of Evolution.

Then on this Earth our Existence had been probable.

And we find no Evidence of Life anywhere.

Some Facts to consider

1. There are Things, Light, Eyes sensitive to Light and Vision. Thus a complete knowledge and correlation is essential for Vision
2. Sounds and Vibrations of various types , Air, Ears, Hearing Thus a complete knowledge and correlation is essential for Hearing
3. A complete Food Chain. A safe distance. An ability to attack. An ability to escape. Thus a complete knowledge and correlation is essential to maintain Food Chain.
4. The smallest conscious creature knows self, others, its food, its enemy, its home, its mate , its eggs and off-springs, knows death and difference between living and dead.
5. The bodies of plants and cells are made up of Cells. The Cells of each Species and each individuals are unique and are capable of growth, division, performing specific jobs and able to recover and heal.
6. The water freezes at 0^o C and miraculously it is heaviest at 4^oC. Thus all aquatic animals escape death when any water body freezes. They remain at 4^oC covered by ice.
7. The Moon presents just one face towards us and so we don’t get confused and can easily know the date from seeing the appearance of Moon.
8. The spots on Moon, called Man in the Moon, capture our gaze otherwise all of us had been blind in the childhood if we had focussed our gaze on bright surface of Moon.
9. The plants produce beautiful aromatic flowers and fruits - the plants, animals and insects don’t have abilities to perceive this Beauty.
10. The Beauty is in from smallest- Electron microphotograph to the largest Hubble pictures.
11. Drugs, perfumes, gum, rubber and many such products are of no one’s use except our use and pearls, gems, stones, precious metals, no one needs except us. These things are made by small plants those need just soil, water and air and if we try to make these things we need raw material, energy, factory and workers to make any of these things.

Thus Wisdom and Beauty in Cosmos confirm existence of Creator.

Need of other World to complete a coherent picture

But why there is Death, Premature Death, so much Destruction and Calamities? We have found Wisdom and Aesthetics but we fail to find Justice and Mercy.

Does Creator not know to create immortal cells? Are we here to suggest radio-activity, radiations, vibrations and atomic energy to be used in cells in place of oxidation of glucose to sustain life?

Now it is known that Death is not due to some incapability but it has been programmed in Cells.

In this World, there is so much injustice, evil, atrocities and suffering. The Creator is immortal. The Stars, Sun and Moon also exist since long. We human beings and animals, particularly those who are blind and incapacitated since birth, those children who have painful fatal diseases, those who were raped, maimed and killed, those who have been victim of crimes, riots and wars- have right to ask the Creator that why such life was given to them, they don’t want such life, such world.

The Justice and Mercy demand that there be compensation. Thus existence of Other World and After-life become logically essential as Wisdom and Aesthetics can not exist without Justice and Mercy. It is impossible that we possess sense of Justice and have Mercy and the Creator be devoid of it.

Why one animal is food of other animal. We must ask and search the answer. In our body, there are lot of cells, dying and getting replaced, some cells engulf other cells. Here we don’t see any evil because we exist as an individual whereas our cells don’t exist as an individual. The Soul is the deciding factor. It is possible that all the individuals of one animal species exist as one soul. This means all deer are one Deer. Or one setting of nature exist-the lion and deer both belong to it.

We human beings can not live as animals live instinctually without ethical questions. Our Consciousness is different from animals; we have to answer ethical questions at each step of our life.

The God created us in Other World. That World contains the Past and Future of this World. That World is like an Art Gallery-living and conscious. This World is like an Album. The whole Art Gallery is passing through this Album and returning back to that World. All that we lost and forgotten is alive there.

When God intended to create this World then Time and Space came into existence.

Similarly, the God is Consciousness. The Nature is Encon that operates this world. The encon of human beings, animals and plants and everything is part of the Encon of Nature.

In this World in place of Creation there is

Step by Step Coded genesis by Nature

The Nature built everything intended by God in this world through code and its execution. The God intended iron to be built. The Nature produced properties by operating on particular part of Earth. The Space must be understood as consisting of multiple paths and gates. These paths and gates transform the effect of Energy and Force. In this way, blackness, heaviness, strength and magnetism was produced by Nature by opening and closing particular gates and simultaneously the micro-particles present at that place got systematized into a code peculiar to properties of iron. Now, wherever this code will be transported, it will manifest the properties of iron.

Thus different elements, compounds and substances were built by Nature.

Then using these substances, Nature built blank plant cells. First, the first stage of plant cells were built and genes got arranged accordingly. Some such cells were set free to develop and propagate. Then next stage of plant life was built, the genes re-arranged to second stage. Again, some cells were set free to develop and propagate.

In this way, all species were built each having corresponding genetic code. According to changed conditions, modifications occurred along with corresponding modification in their genetic code.

Similarly, Nature built blank animal cells using plant products in its constitution and then built different stages of animal evolution and genetic code kept changing at each stage. At every stage, some cells were set free to develop and propagate as animals of that stage. According to changed conditions, modifications occurred along with corresponding modification in their genetic code.

Thus, all animals and we human beings were built in this world though we already exist in that World where we were created by God’s intention.

The galaxies, stars, sun, planets, moon all these bodies were formed and are in orbital motion as Nature operates upon Space according to their code.

Similarly, air, water, weather and climate were built by Nature, all according to code.

Thus everything is in order. One animal is food of other on completion of its life so there not be problem of carcass and its decomposition.

WHY EVIL ?

We are limited Consciousness but still Consciousness and the God made Nature to be responsive to our Consciousness. Therefore Evil in our Consciousness affects adversely the execution of code by Nature. Thus animals also started defying Laws of Nature and started eating young ones.

In this way, all disasters and calamities occur because of Evil in our Consciousness.

The fact that this World is merely a Codes and its execution and that Nature itself is affected by our Consciousness explains two very important features of modern age:

1. Our failure to comprehend this World as it is just a code, no other reality.
2. Our success in Technology because we succeed in whatever we intend.

GLOBAL NAMES

All men and women are equal and brothers and sisters. No family or caste is superior and inferior. Those who have reached this level of understanding, they may wish to shed away communal and caste identity but name given to us betrays our family communal and caste identity.

We can make our name global by a simple procedure.

First remove the vowels and then re-insert in series of a-e-i-o-u

Suppose someone’s name is SHANKER DAYAL

First remove vowels and it becomes

SH-N-K-R D-Y-L

Now, re-insert vowels in series of a-e-i-o-u

It becomes

SHANEKIRO DUALE

Thus we recover a global name without communal and caste identity.

Now time has come to forget that one is Hindu,Muslim,Christian,Sikh or Buddhist. The religion is private affair. It is a Search- unique and very vert personal for each of us. There may be people of different faith in one family and there may be a person having different faith in different periods of his life. I rever Buddha,Jesus and Nanak and follow Love approach of Swami Ram Teerth. Thus every person has unique composite religion and spirituality and thus now people can not be classified truly in religion.

GLOBALIZATION OF HUMANITY

The GOOD can be achieved only through Universal Enlightenment and not through use of Force. The history of Islam and of Communism confirms this.

All human beings are Equal and Brother/Sister to each other. Thus true Globalization means establishment of Equality, Liberty and Brotherhood through Education and Enlightenment.

All this is feasible now when World is in pursuit Economic Globalizations and old walls of Community, Caste, Culture, and Nationalism are crumbling.

The World is divided into Nations (divisions of Modern Times), Religions (divisions of Medieval Times) and Castes/Ethnic Groups/Races (divisions since Ancient Times because of marrying within a closed group and settling in particular geographic & climatic conditions). Thus people Fear and Hate people apparently different from their group.

. We must work for Universal Brotherhood, Non-violence and Peace.

We must shed away Group Identities and must become World Citizen. How to do it?

1. Global Names:

The differences and discriminations start from Names and Names can be very easily globalized, for example by changing the vowels and rearranging in a sequence of a-e-i-o-u. Thus Mohan Das can be globalized into Maheni Dosu , removing all semblance of Community e.t.c.

2. Reorganize World:

The inability to solve the problem of Household work and menial and dirty work is behind all subjugation and exploitation of Castes and Sexes. The women were subjugated to do the household work. Other people were enslaved to do the menial and hard work. All these works can be managed equitably and thus Freedom and Equality can be restored to all people.

The whole world can be organized in more effective way into

The World to be divided into 10 regions.

1. Each Region of 1000,000,000 people and divided into 10 sectors

2. Each Sector of 100,000,000 people and divided into 10 provinces.

3. Each Province of 10,000,000 people and divided into 10 districts.

4. Each District having 1000.000 people

Following Departments at each level from District to the World level can care all social needs –

1) Food for All

2) Water for All

3) Clothing for All

4) Housing for All

5) Health for All

6) Energy for All

7) Transport for All

8) Communication for All

9) Security for All

10) Environment for All

11) Law & Justice for All

12) Education for All

13) Recreation for All

Each child will be free to join Department of his/her choice and interest. From Manual work to Planning and Administration and Research and Development will be done in cycles by each person. The apprentices of each department will do the Sanitary, domestic and patrolling jobs. There will be houses for families and hostels for men and women. The work of Kitchen, laundering and cleanliness will be done jointly in a building or with assistance from apprentices.

The Education and Training will be provided to each child through Department in the following way

1. Common Education through Education Department up to age of 17 years
2. Next 3 Years: Learning Class III work of one’s Department and doing part-time Class IV work. Thus in Health Department one will receive training of Nurse or Technician and will do the part time work of Ward boy or Lab attendant.
3. Next 5 Years: Learning Class II work and doing part-time Class III work. Thus in Health Department one will receive Medical Education and will do the part-time work of Nurse or Technician.

Thus everyone will rise in his/her field of interest and all Class IV and Class III level work will be done along with.

All menial and sanitary work will be done through mechanization, robotics and by apprentices well protected with wearing gowns, gloves and goggles.

In this way, all men and women will remain World Citizen and on their abilities will rise from District to World level. There will be no nations to fight with each other, no army, no arms race and no nuclear holocaust.

We may hope that more and more people will subscribe to this programme of World Management and in days to come smooth transition may become feasible.

Why not live in Hostels and wander in the World?

Much of the problem is that people are living in separate houses and running households without any need. The arthritic, hypertensive, diabetic and with compromised vision and hearing housewives continue in their job as they were doing for last half-century. The young Couples who have much to do in this world and old Couples who have grown-up children must live in Hostels for Couples. We will need fewer houses if only those Couples who opt for raising children live in it. The single ones must live in Hostels for Singles. There must be Care Homes for Children, Old and Infirm. The Boys and Girls to live in Hostels meant for them.

Whether living in Houses, Hostels or Homes, much of the Domestic Work will be taken care by concerned Departments.

We must go on changing our settlement after every 5 years and we must shift to some other part of World. Thus after age of 25, we may have 10 and more options to settle in different parts of world.

Find the Spirit not Body of Religion

No one is Jew, Christian or Muslim. There are individuals, more correctly families that identify themselves and identified by others as Jew, Christian or Muslim etc. These families are in majority or minority in different parts of world. Certainly there were Religions – Judaism, Christianity and Islam and others founded in Medieval Times and we have books – Old Testament, New Testament and Quran and other scriptures and also history/stories and some other books related to these Religions. Now any person who seriously observes any Religion goes on changing his/her Views and Practices time to time and also no two persons observing same Religion hold same Views and Practices. These Religions also vary in different Times, Places and People. The followers of any particular Religion feel that they are on right path and what they believe and practice is correct one and it is same since origin of their Religion and it is actually what their Founder preached. Historically, the Body of any Religion goes on changing and also multiplying and we can not resurrect the original one and no need to do so because Spirit is same and every Founder of Religion propounded Religion under existing circumstances and conditions that have now changed. Thus we must recover the Spirit of Religion-Universal Brotherhood and Love and keep different Bodies of Religion preserved for posterity and must go on transmitting the Spirit alone. I want to say that all Religions have same Spirit. This Spirit is cosmopolitan. The differences in beliefs and practices are incidental. The primary differences are due to early circumstances under which this Spirit had to embody. The secondary differences are due to changed circumstances, misunderstandings, politics, factionalism and so on.

Thus no one is Jew, Christian or Muslim. We unnecessarily divide and isolate ourselves on basis of Religion, Country or ethnicity. There are different Religions, Political theories and ideologies and scientific theories. We remain united against common enemy or target and then differences arise and we get divided into Sects and these Sects go on warring. We attack others for their Property, Land and Women or we attacked people to enslave them to do work we ourselves do not want to do. The Religion, Civilization and Ideology were just pretext.

Now all this is part of history. There are afraid people who hate people of other groups-if born in a so called Jew family, they hate so called Christian and/ or Muslim and if born in so called Christian family they hate so called Jew and/or Muslim and if born in so called Muslim family they hate so called Jew and/or Christian.

These Religions have evolved in form never intended by their Founder. No Founder wished that World be divided into two warring camps. Neither wished that his followers be orthodox and superstitious; fearing and hating; harsh and cruel; rapist and killer; rioters and terrorists. The Founders wished to spread Brotherhood and Goodness whereas their founded Religions today divide and spread Evil and followers doing Evil in the name of Religion. (Here, the Founder may be a single Historical person who proclaimed the Religion or main personalities who helped in development and codification or one may take God as Founder.) Why God will wish that people remain divided and fighting each other or just worshipping and engaged in rites and rituals.

We must pick up Truth and Good only and not divide ourselves. We Human beings must develop modern Global religion based on Universal Brotherhood, Non-violence, Equality of people & sexes and World Peace. This will be the in True Spirit of Old & New Testament and Quran and all other scriptures. No need to identify ourselves or others as Jew, Christian or Muslim etc.

The World is divided into Nations: whose interest does it serve? Initially it were Empire builders who attacked other countries to spread their brand of Civilization and later on to spread their brand of Religion- through raping, killing, plundering and enslaving. With industrialization, empires disintegrated and Nations came into existence- each with arms and armies and restrictions on free-movement of human beings. The Nuclear holocaust demands dis-armament and not possible till amalgamation of all Nations. Thus we need Universal Brotherhood.

In early phase of their history, batches of Human beings settled to distant places and married within that group. They developed separate language, dresses, culture and religion. Because of living at particular place for long under same dose of Sunlight and same climatic conditions, they acquired distinct complexion, features and body habitus. The slight difference in quantity of Melanin pigment under the skin due to exposure to sun made us Race-conscious. There developed fear of pollution and getting over-whelmed by others.

The people should be free to settle at any place and must go on changing their settlements every 5 or so years thus living in different parts of world in their life-time and marry to partner of their choice. Gradually, a global race will evolve with global language, global culture and global religion based on Universal Brotherhood.

This is moksha- liberation from divisions and discriminations we got on being born-nationality, community, ethnicity and gender bias. We must shed away all this and must be integrated with all.

We all are born with a wound in our heart, as if an empty cup of wine. We shield this wound and its pain from the world and ourselves. We build a hard shell of Ego around this wound.

Different people adopt different means to fill up this Emptiness-some run for Worldly Possessions, some Indulge in sensual pleasures, some adopt Arrogance, some Fear and Hate others.

But this Emptiness can be cured by Wine of Love and not by any other means. Those who adopt other means are bound to fail and go on suffering in this world. Absence of Love generates Fear and fear gives rise to Hate- this is the condition of modern world.

A breeze of Love shatters the hardest shell of Ego and we become all wounded and bleeding- fully exposed of our poverty. Only the presence of Loved One gives us relief. We transpose all Virtues and Perfection to our object of Love. But our Object of Love is equally weak and poor.

Thus our Love for particular person must mature and must overflow to become Love All, must encompass whole World.

Our overflowing Love All may transform others and may transform this World and we will yearn for Universal( Brother & Sister)Sib-hood and Equality and for Harmony with whole Cosmos.

Injustices and Crimes against Fair Sex

The mankind is divided into two sexes and most of the beauty and interest in this world is due to members of Fair Sex but still in this male-dominated patriarchal society the Fair Sex has to suffer a lot.

1. Language bias: The word Man and Male have become primary word and stand for masculine and the words woman and female have to be derived from primary thus they become secondary to start with thus a bias is generated. This can be remedied either choosing some other common words or Man and Male must be made common words and words for masculine must be derived from it like Peman (man with penis) and Gemale analogous to Woman (man with womb) and Female.

The pronouns must be dealt similarly or they must be common and in capital must be used for God thus saving God from Gender connotations.

2. Custom bias: The Fair Sex is expected to disclose marital status along with name.

Now no need to do this.

3. The divorce or death of spouse must not make any difference in social standing. The events in life must not affect adversely.
4. Rape is like attempt on Life and it must not make any difference in social standing, the attacker must be punished. The victim must be helped and cared.

There must be concentrated efforts to bring these points to home in minds of all people preferably from the school days.

The crimes against Fair Sex are Female feticide, Female infanticide, Acts of omission like not providing food, clothes, education, medical care etc at par with boys, customs of Dowry and harassment of bride and killing for dowry and rape and killing on marrying against honour.

The World is divided into Nations (divisions of Modern Times), Religions (divisions of Medieval Times) and Castes/Ethnic Groups/Races (divisions since Ancient Times because of marrying within a closed group and settling in particular geographic & climatic conditions). Thus people Fear and Hate people apparently different from their group. Liberation from divisions and discriminations we got on being born-nationality, community, ethnicity and gender bias is true Moksha.

. We all must agree that killing of innocents and destructions are Crimes against Humanity whether done by Terrorists or Governments. Then we must work for Universal (Sister &Brother) Sib-hood, Non-violence and Peace.

.

Fallacies of Special Theory of Relativity and Alternative Explanation of NULL result of Michelson Morley Experimrnt.

Introduction

1.This World even observed by un-aided eyes provides much interesting things and surprise to human mind. The Space Agencies and Observatories world over are reporting interesting findings almost everyday.

We human beings speculate to explain various Facts.

2. Facts Vs Speculations; We must be able to discern Facts from Speculation. The red shift is a fact observed by Hubble Telescope but expanding universe is a speculation to explain it.

Ptolemy system was able to explain changes in position of stars and planets on assumption of stationary Earth.

Copernican system established supremacy of Modern Science over Church- holding Medieval views, by showing that Earth is moving round the Sun.

The motion of Earth round the Sun is the fundamental belief of Science and it has been the main issue between the Science and Church. The Michelson Morley Experiment by its NULL result shook the very foundation of Copernican system. It is not Aether that was refuted; it was displacement of Earth in Absolute Space that was refuted. It means Earth is not getting displaced with respect to Absolute Space.

3. Reasons for acceptance of Lorentz contraction and Special Theory of Relativity by early 20th Century Physics: The Paradox of The Null result of Michelson-Morley Experiment (MMX) compelled Physics of Early 20^th Century to accept the logic of Special theory of Relativity. The null result of MMX was a great dilemma as it refuted motion of Earth in Absolute Space. This inference was either not comprehended or not acknowledged publicly and MMX presented as refutation of Aether. The STR was a step ahead of Lorentz Contraction by making all experimental verifications of Lorentz Contraction physically impossible by its logic.

The 20^th Century Physics shaken by NULL result of MMX found savior in STR. The acceptance of STR opened the Pandora’s box of all wild inferences.

The NULL result of Michelson-Morley Experiment is a fact while Special theory of Relativity is just a human speculation to explain it.

Discussion

The Logic of STR is fallacious in its Derivations and in its Assumptions as shown below:

1-Logic of Special Theory of Relativity

The logic of STR can be presented in simple way as following:

Let there be just two frames of References.

1. Moving frame F₁, moving with relativistic velocity V_f1. Suppose it is a carriage with a lamp at floor and a mirror on ceiling, just above and in line with lamp at floor.

The height of carriage be H. The velocity of light be C

2. Other frame F₂that is stationary relative to Moving frame F₁.

Now, a beam of light travels straight from lamp at floor, strikes the mirror at ceiling and returns to floor in the moving carriage F₁.

. This is an Event in moving frame F₁

The path of beam of Light is H distance up and H distance down. And total time T₁ will be 2H/C in moving carriage.

The STR derives from this that time T₁ for this Event in moving carriage F₁ will be 2H/C and in other frame F₂ stationary with respect to moving frame, using Pythagorean theorem, the Time T₂ will be 2H/C*1/þ1- V_f1²/C²

( here þ used for square root of succeeding terms)

According to S.T.R., this difference in Time T₁ in F₁ and T₂ in F₂ is real. It was concluded that Time T₁ in moving frame F₁. moves slower as it is less than Time T₂ calculated for F₂ as described.

The people were led to believe that one Twin in a space ship moving on with relativistic velocity (F₁) would remain younger than the other one on Earth (F₂).

2-Fallacy of Derivations

The Time T₁ in moving frame F₁ as shown in above formula of STR does not depend on its Velocity V_f1 of moving frame but it depends on height of carriage. The speed of Light C itself is considered constant. Hence if we go on increasing or decreasing the velocity of moving frame V_f1, then its Time T₁ will not decrease or increase as per above formula as it does not consist of V_f1. The distance and time in moving frame F₁ depends upon height of carriage. Thus twin in moving frame F₁ is not going to be younger by increasing velocity V_f1 of moving frame. The Time T₁ is independent of V_f1.

Instead, according to above logic, the Time T₂ in frame F₂ will increase or decrease with increase or decrease in velocity V_f1 of moving frame F₁ as shown by formula of STR for T₂. Thus according to logic of STR, the twin in stationary frame F₂ will be younger or older on decreasing or increasing the velocity V_f1 of moving frame F₁.

This miracle may be accepted if there be only just these two frames F₁ and F₂ in Cosmos.

There are infinite numbers of moving frames F₁ F₃ F₄ F₅ F_{6 ……} F_n with different velocities V_f1 V_f3 V_f4 V_f5 V_{f6 ……} V_fn. As Time T₂ in frame F₂ will be affected, according to STR, by different Velocities of all remaining frames F₁ F₃ F₄ F₅ F₆ F_n moving relative to F₂, it is illogical and impossible to base Time T₂ in one frame F₂ on velocity of rest of other moving frames.

3-Fallacy of Assumptions

The assumption that path of beam of light striking the overhead mirror in moving frame will be straight is itself fallacious as shown here by some further refinements in our Imaginary Experiment.

Here the roof of carriage is transparent. Our lamp is capable of emitting just single Photon (or any micro-particle) detectable by one Observer at the place of mirror and by one Observer in outer space in helicopter in line with lamp and inner observer.

Initially all the three- lamp, inner observer and outer observer are in a line. The lamp emits the single photon up.

As soon as single photon is emitted, it goes straight up towards roof and in the meantime, our inner observer (mirror) is shifted to a distance H* V_f1/C. Thus single photon will not strike the inner observer (mirror), instead it will cross the transparent roof almost un-deflected and will be detected by outside observer. (The beams of Light are not deflected by gravity or velocity of moving frame to that extent as macro-particles are deflected.)

Thus straight beam of light will not strike the mirror in carriage moving with relativistic velocity, only oblique beam of light will strike the mirror in carriage moving with relativistic velocity and this time T₁ will also be 2H/C*þ1+ V_f1²/C² and not 2H/C for such oblique beams.

We must not assume that micro-particles or beam of light and X-rays get deflected by movement of frame to the same extent as macro-particles, bullet or ball, get deflected.

If beam of Light start getting affected by velocity of moving frame as macro-particles, bullet or ball, are affected then

1. Speed of moving bodies will be added to speed of Light
2. We will not be able to see objects moving away from us in one direction, as all the beams of Light will get deflected away from us in that direction.

New Explanation

But there is a geo-specific solution to this paradox, not thought of 100
years ago.
We hold a Special Clock with a single needle moving per Second. This
needle moves with respect to numbers on dial and also moves with respect to its center of attachment. This needle is also getting displaced with respect to outside objects too.
Now we will move the whole clock anti-clockwise so that needle always
remains aligned to some outside object (say, the Ceiling Fan).

Now this needle is moving with respect to numbers on dial and its center as before but remains un-displaced with respect to outside objects such as Ceiling Fan.
If there be a mini - observatory and a mini-laboratory on this needle then we will
record observational proof of displacement with respect to number on dials and its center
of attachment but we will record NULL result in Experiments devised to detect its displacement, because needle remains un-displaced with respect to outside Space.

Here we can take the Clock as representing the Cosmos . The Ceiling Fan represents a fixed point in Absolute Space/ Extra-cosmic Space. On this analogy, we may understand that Earth is getting displaced with respect to Stars and Sun but remains un-displaced in Absolute Space.

Thus we can detect whether any moving body is getting displaced with respect to points of Extra-cosmic space or not by Michelson Morley Experiment. The NULL result of Michelson-Morley Experiment signifies non-displacement of moving frame, Earth, with respect to points in Extra-cosmic space/Absolute Space.

The displacement due to Diurnal motion (Rotation) of Earth on its axis is experimentally detectable, as by Foucault pendulum but displacement of Earth due to Annual motion(Revolution), approx.30 Km/Sec, with respect to Sun and stars is experimentally not detected so far. The Displacement due to this motion may be effectively countered by simultaneous reverse motion at different Gravitational levels -Sun, Galaxy, Local Group and Higher level.

Thus according to model presented here, Earth remains un-displaced despite its motion with respect to Sun and Stars because of simultaneous motion of Sun, Galaxy, Local Group and some relevant portion or whole of Cosmos in reverse.

This explains plenty of Observational proofs of Earth’s motion with respect to Sun and Stars but no experiment to detect its displacement because Earth remains where it is despite its motion with respect to Sun and Stars and therefore we have NULL result of Michelson-Morley Experiment when performed on surface of Earth.

Conclusion

1-Question is whether this Paradox of Experimental NULL result is a
GENERAL PHENOMENON or a GEO-SPECIFIC PHENOMENON.

Michelson-Morley Experiments when performed on other Cosmic Bodies, such as on surface of Moon will settle the issue.

2-.Proposal to Space Agency It is proposed to perform Michelson-Morley Experiment on other Cosmic bodies whenever feasible, such as on Moon.

Such an Experiment if shows NULL result then it will confirm that all developments of last 100 years in line of STR are correct and also there is no detectable Absolute Space. But if this Experiment gives not NULL result, as expected here to happen, will confirm that there is Absolute Space, Earth remains un-displaced in Absolute Space by peculiar arrangements as demonstrable by model of Clock presented here.

Days & Dates

Surplus Three Days in 2000 Calendar Years

We know that Earth takes 365 days 5 hours 48 minutes and 46 seconds in its one revolution round the Sun. Thus one Solar Year consists 365.2422 days. In 10000 years, there will be 3652422 days and in 2000 years there must be 730484.40 days.

Historically, we know that

1. In Julian calendar, every 4^th year was a leap year having 366 days. Thus total numbers of days in each century were 36525.
2. In year 1582, 10 days were deleted from the month of October by decree of Pope Gregory XIII. ( 5^th to 14^{th Oct})
3. Year 1600 was a leap year having 366 days.
4. Years 1700,1800 and 1900 were having 365 days each.
5. Year 2000 was a leap year.

Calculating days from first day of first century to 31-12-1500

== 36525*15

=547875

The numbers of days from 1-1-1501 to 31-12-1600 were 36515.

The numbers of days from 1-1-1601 to 31-12-1700 were 36524.

The numbers of days from 1-1-1701 to 31-12-1800 were 36524

The numbers of days from 1-1-1801 to 31-12-1900 were 36524

The numbers of days from 1-1-1901 to 31-12-2000 were 36525

Total numbers of days from 1-1-01 to 31-12-2000 are 730487

Finding week-day of any date

We know 1^st January 2001 fell on Monday. If we divide 730487 (total number of days upto 31-12-2000 ) by 7, we get 2 as remainder. Thus weekday of 1^st month of 1^st year of 1^st Century (1-1-01) was Saturday.

There were 25 leap years of 366 days in each Century from 1^st to 16^th. All these centuries from 1^st to 15^th consisted of 36525 days. The 16^th century consisted of 36515 days. There were 24 leap years in 17^th, 18^th and 19^th Centuries. These centuries consisted of 36524 days. Again, 25 leap years in 20^th Century as year 2000 was leap year and thus 20^th century had 36525 days.

The days will shift by 6 days if previous century consists 36525 days and will shift 5 days if previous century consists of 36524 days as we can see by dividing total number of days of previous century by 7.

Thus

1-1-01 Saturday

1-1-101 Friday

1-1-201 Thursday

1-1-301 Wednesday

1-1-401 Tuesday

1-1-501 Monday

1-1-601 Sunday

1-1-701 Saturday

1-1-801 Friday

1-1-901 Thursday

1-1-1001 Wednesday

1-1-1101 Tuesday

1-1-1201 Monday

1-1-1301 Sunday

1-1-1401 Saturday

1-1-1501 Friday

As we know 16^th century was of 36515 days, so the days will shift 3 days and

1-1-1601 Monday

17^th, 18th and 19^th centuries were of 36524 days and so the days will shift by 5 days and

1-1-1701 Saturday

1-1-1801 Thursday

1-1-1901 Tuesday

The 20^th century was of 36525 days; the days will shift again 6 days

1-1-2001 Monday

After finding the day of first day of each century, we can find the day of 1^st of any year in that century. (The 16^th century has special features and will be described later)

We will take number of years and add to it number of leap years and then divide it by 7 , thus we will know the shift of days from the day of 1^st day of that century.

As we know that 1-1-1901 was on Tuesday.

We can know day of 1-1-1991 by adding 22 leap years to 90 years and dividing this figure of 112 by 7.We get 0 as remainder. Thus 1-1-1991 will fall on same day-Tuesday.

After finding day of 1^st January of any year, we can find the day of 1^st of other months.

1^st February +3

1^st March +3 if non-leap year

+4 if leap year

1^st April +3 to 1^st March

1^st May +2 to 1^st April

1^st June +3 to 1^st May

1^st July +2 to 1^st June

1^st August +3 to 1^st July

1^st September +3 to 1^st August

1^st October +2 to 1^st September

1^st November +3 to 1^st October

1^st December +2 to 1^st November

The day of 1^st of any month is also the day of 8^th, 15^th, 22^nd and 29^th of that month. Thus we can find day of any date of any month of any year of any century.

Special case of 16^th Century

We know day of 1-1-1501 was Friday.

We can find day of 1-1-1582 by adding 20 leap years to 81 years and dividing by 7 thus we get 3. Thus day of 1-1-1582 will be Monday.

1-2-1582 Thursday

1-3-1582 Thursday

1-4-1582 Sunday

1-5-1582 Tuesday

1-6-1582 Friday

1-7-1582 Sunday

1-8-1582 Wednesday

1-9-1582 Saturday

1-10-1582 Monday

4-10-1582 Thursday

No dates from 5-10-1582 to 14-10-1582

15-10-1582 Friday

1-11-1582 Monday

1-12-1582 Wednesday

1-1-1583 Saturday

As number of days in year 1582 were 355

1-1-1584 Sunday

1-1-1585 Tuesday because 1584 was leap year.

1-1-1586 Wednesday

1-1-1587 Thursday

1-1-1588 Friday

1-1-1589 Sunday because 1588 was leap year

1-1-1590 Monday

1-1-1591 Tuesday

1-1-1592 Wednesday

1-1-1593 Friday because 1592 was leap year

1-1-1594 Saturday

1-1-1595 Sunday

1-1-1596 Monday

1-1-1597 Wednesday because 1596 was leap year

1-1-1598 Thursday

1-1-1599 Friday

1-1-1600 Saturday

1-1-1601 Monday because 1600 was a leap year

From here, we join the mainstream as described above.

Thus we can find the day of any date of any month of any year of any century.

Shahida Phonetics Code

We human beings speak- we emit different type of sounds and through their we make words that have meaning known to all of us, thus we can communicate our experiences, thoughts and feeling with each other.

The common sounds used by us are

1. P
2. M
3. B
4. T (r)
5. N
6. D (M- n)
7. Ch
8. J
9. T(V-r)
10. K
11. G
12. Y
13. L
14. R
15. W
16. Sh
17. S
18. H

Initially we can do without expressing Vowels as in Urdu writing usually ‘matraas’ are not written and people guess the word without these ‘maatras’

We need three types of expression of Phonetics

1. Script to read
2. Sign language for hearing challenged and for those who are vocally challenged
3. Touch Script for those who are visually challenged.

Now there is a Rational method to make Phonetic Code.

When we speak these sounds then the sounds emitted through lips, tongues or palate get emitted either from left, from middle or from right.

s.no Area Left Middle Right

1 Lips P M B

2 Tongue behind teeth T(r) N D(n)

3 Tongue front of Palate Ch J

4 Tongue mid-palate T (V) D (M)

5 Tongue back of palate K G

6 Sound soft from throat, back of palate Y L

7 Sound soft from throat, front of palate R W (lips

rounded)

8 A Intense sound from throat , tongue on front part of palate Sh

8 B Sound from throat, tongue mid palate S

8 C intense sound from throat, tongue free H

( 8A will be supposed Left, 8B supposed Middle and 8C supposed Right on pattern of 1 to 7 above mentioned. Though these are not left, middle or right but are front, mid and back)

Now by adding H to P, B, T(r), D(n), Ch, J, T (V), D (M), K, G , other souds of Hindi alphabet can be expressed.

SCRIPT without letters, only numbers

It may be possible that many illiterate persons have difficulty in remembering shapes of letters and so they can not learn reading and writing and thus reducing whole alphabert into numbers 1 to 8 and their rational correlation with movements of lips,tongue,palate and throat may help them.

Thus by using numbers from 1 to 8 and then by bracketing right and left and by underlining we can express Left, Middle and Right.

1) P

1 M

(1 B

Thus any person having difficulty in learning alphabet may express sounds by using numbers one to eight.

Sign Language

1 expressed by touching top of head, left, middle and right to express P,M,B

2 expressed by touching eyes

3 expressed by touching ears and for middle by touching back of head at level of ears

4 expressed by touching nose

5 expressed by touching mouth

6 expressed by touching neck and throat

7 expressed by touching shoulders

8A by touching chest

8B by touching upper belly

8C expressed by touching lower belly.

The above expressions can be done by holding one rod having 8 cross bars that people may keep along with them.

Touch Script

Now above 1 to 8 numbers can be expressed by two types of pins.

one T shaped for 1

other trishul shaped for 3

These can be planted

/ for left

- for middle

\ for right

Thus all necessary sounds can be communicated to a visually challenged person with help of two type of pins.

There are three Urdu/Arabic sounds from deep throat

gh left as in ghulam

kh middle as in khoobsoorat

Q right as in Qaiser

The code may be made for these sounds

As we know sound of P is from lips left

Ph here lower lip protrudes out

F here lower lip curls back

LOVE IS GOD, GOD IS LOVE

We have seen that the findings of Intricate Mechanisms, Wisdom and Beauty at all level suggest that in creation and running of Cosmos some Conscious Intervention is working.

We also put suggestion that God only intends and Nature builds the Things by building Codes, side by side. The Nature is Programme Writer and Programme Executor both.

The errors in Programme Execution may occur because of evil influences of Human Consciousness.

We also saw that our Soul, a portion of all prevailing Consciousness gets coupled with our developing nervous system and gets released after death of nervous system.

If we live a life of LOVE then we build Paradise for ourselves and if we opt for Lust, Arrogance and Hatred then we build Hell for ourselves.

All this is spontaneous and no Day of Judgement is required.

It is also very likely that all souls pass different levels of Existence and Human Existence is final and thus no need for other lives to remain eternally. Our pet dog after passing through higher levels will be born as a human and then it will have chance to build heaven or hell for himself.

God is essentially Love and every soul is given chances for redemption. Some may be incorrigible and they will finally settle in their Hell of their own making.

My Story

When I was a small child my elder brother once gave me a lump of salt (those days salt was sold in lumps ) to suck. I kept it in my mouth and then threw it. My elder brother said that now you will be made to pick that salt over your eyelashes by God.

An intense fear and then intense revulsion against such God came in my heart when I was about 6 years old.

When I grew up and came to know that some people say there is no God so I joined their creed. When I was 17 years old I heard about Bertrand Russell and I became his follower.

When I was in Intermediate, my father repeatedly pointed about squint in my eye. I became very much squint-conscious and my whole stay in GSVM Medical college Kanpur passed under this and associated inferiority complex. The Professor and Head Department of Ophthalmology Dr R.T.Singh said ‘No Squint’ but I could not believe it. I liked a girl of my batch and used to look towards her, she once came to my table but even then I could not say any word. Then in Allahabad, I was father of a son and she was also married and practising there, once she passed on rickshaw, I was on foot, we came face to face and I could not utter any word. She once remarked to our neighbour ( she had lived in the same house where we were staying) that he is so gentle that if anyone say anything wrong to him he will not say any word. In 1981, I got nervous breakdown then I asked my wife to write a letter to her.

I used to read Philosophy of Bertrand Russell and used to think lying on my bed . I was in 5^th year, perhaps living in first floor hostel no. 1 in 1970-71 ( perhaps numbering has been changed now) or in Room No 109 of PG Hostel, my room attendent , called farrash, whose name was Bhagwati told me that he is palmist. I showed him my palm. He said you will marry yourself and your people will become angry, then she will die and you will marry someone your colleague or under you and your people will become agreed. You will do some very great thing in Science.

I wanted greatness but after marrying I prayed to God neither I want greatness nor second marriage , let her live. Perhaps because of this we could live for about 34 years and she went under conditions described below.

I wanted love and so I talked to a girl when our bus reached at Kanpur Bus Station about sunset on 2^nd January 1972. I did not want to cheat anyone so I made her my wife in my heart. We were separated by her uncle in month of April, who dropped her in her village. Her brother was studying in a college in Kanpur. Both were removed. Her brother was admitted in a college in Azamgarh. I managed to get their address from his college and then I came to know they belonged to scheduled caste from school record. My father was District Judge Azamgarh. Mr Bhupinder Singh was S.P. I was very sad, I insisted upon my father to help her. Mr Bhupinder Singh called her father and told they are dirty,poor,harijan and he told me you will not get any pleasure of sasural in-laws home.

Then I failed in Medicine in final examination. One evening, she left her home and

journeyed from Azamgarh to Kanpur and came in my hostel. I took her to my room. Next morning, we proceeded to Delhi for court marriage. We failed as the lawyer was demanding Rs 100 immediately. In our sadness, we proceeded towards house of Indira Gandhi. There the man sent us to Tughlaq Road Police Station. She was sent to Nari Niketan. There I knew she is chamar. They let me go as I was son of a District Judge but asked me to come in the morning. I knew that it may be dangerous and I may also be arrested ( it was true as she told me that magistrate was angry why the boy was let to go). Then her father came and took her to his house. I went to my father, who dropped at my brother-in-law,who was City Magistrate Allahabad. I was emotionally wreck.There I stayed and read much of Bertrand Russell as one of his relative Mr Sardar Agha was a librarian perhaps at Central Pedagogical Institute,Allahabad.

Then I recovered and returned to re-appear for final examination. I had a very good relationship with Dr SB Singh child psychologist. Once he called me and said Sharda is back and is in his chamber. So surprising. She had told to her family that she has got married and started putting on sindoor red pigment symbol of marriagehood and wearing bichchia, a toe-ring, symbol of marriagehood. Her brother had dropped her.

Initially, I tried to adjust in Kanpur and in Hindus. I got myself changed to Satish Chandra Arya in Arya Samaj Mandir Azamgarh. The news of our marriage reached to our parents who sent my elder brother Jawed to bring us. Sadly,Jawed bhai died in 2009 in hands of modern Medical Technology-Intensive Care Unit. No effort to cure just keep alive and get money to keep ICU running.

. Then with him, we reached Moradabad, where my father was District Judge.

Our nikaah was performed there in presence of grand-parents, uncles and aunts.

My son Rishad born on 11 April 1973, the day my father got news of his being elevated to High Court.

She did BEd and MA with changed name of Shahida, all this change of name done to be accommodated in the family, though nobody asked to do so. This jeopardized her desire to be I.A.S.

Later on, she herself became Muslim- a devout Muslim.

For our parents happiness, gradually she stopped using sindoor though nobody asked her to do so.We lived in 111 D Ashok Nagar Allahabad. My daughter Meena was born there 24^th October 1977. My wife had to suffer much as EMO doctor caused her perineal tear.

Then we came to 1 Raj Bhawan Colony Lucknow. Her younger brother Ashok became I.A.S.

I wanted to establish my household and so I insisted for separate house. First we lived in MIG 76 Aliganj Colony then shifted to 7/9 Dalibagh Colony. There on 1^st Jan 1980.we were in our parent’s house in this New Year’s night, theft occured in our house. All her Jewellery and all our clothes stolen. Her accepted brother Mr SR Arun was SSP Lucknow.

We had come to stay with my parents as I had fallen sick in Dalibagh Colony.

But all these days I always had pain for all those who are victims of injustice. The news of rapes and atrocities used to make me very sad and helpless.

When I was about 30 years old, in such mood I wrote ‘May there be some God who avenge for all this Injustice”. Perhaps same night or in next night, I had sudden awareness of Existence of God.

I wept whole night. Next night, I also kept weeping but suddenly it came to me that it is the purpose of life to know God and as I have known it so I am going to die.

I woke up my father and asked him to recite me Kalma as I am going to die. Then I was calling everyone to come to me, come into my arms for redemption.

I became conscious that my wife Sharda/Shahida is standing and weeping so the desire to live woke up. And I lost my mental balance. I was admitted in Balrampur Hospital, where I was posted as Medical Officer. I was full of Love and I was trying to embrace all Nurses on duty and they were avoiding. Soon I recovered. But that trance like state continued and normal life was impossible to live. So I retraced myself and thought erotic things to normalize myself.

Then I adopted religion- Shia Islam. Later on at age of 60, I performed Hajj. During last 30 years of Islamic practice , I became many times irreligious and spiritual. I like spiritualism and dislike orthodoxy. Now, I have shed everything and understand God is Love and Love is God.

On 6^th March 1983 my second daughter Sana was born.

Some day before the memorial of Ali- at Imambara Shahnajaf, I was praying

for knowledge and then suddenly fallacies of Special Theory of Relativity became apparent to me and then I wrote a paper about my alterrnative model and I presented it in 1987 in session of Indian Science Congress Association at Bangalore.

Then we came to stay in Golaganj in 1985 my house has been built by my father.

I got a school opened for her in our house- Bal niketan School from nursery to class 5^th.

In last decade of 20^th century, her community came in power and Chief Minister belonging to her caste.

In 1993, I was posted in District Jail. I worked with Mr I.B.Singh Advocate for release of Women prisoners lodged as convicts in Naribandi Niketan. All these got released. I had spiritual friendship with my beautiful colleague. Later in 2005, I tried to express my liking with one beautiful colleague who snubbed me. Perhaps it was reflexely done as she always remained nice to me but then I decided not to express my liking with anyone.

My wife Sarda/Shahida happily ran the household, the school and had best relationships with everyone in family and in locality. It appears to everyone that she will just come laughing. When she laughed her gums used to get exposed.

My wife left this world in 2008. She was very much emotionally disturbed because of multiple abortions of my daughter-in-law.

Perhaps her soul settled something with God. When she heard that some days have been missed by my daughter-in-law, she became very restless and appeared as if she will die. Then suddenly it came that my daughter-in-law is not pregnant she became normal. She used to have angina pain, not relieved by drugs, usually after dinner and in the night. She used to moan during pain. We had never agreed for Bye-pass Surgery and left everything to God. Her younger brother was Secretary, Medical Education so Medical University and SGPGI Lucknow were under his jurisdiction but we never thought to take his help.

In her last night, she moaned all night and I also remained awake. I always thought that she unnecessarily over-inflates her pains.

In the morning of 30^th January 2008, she was at that time free from pain, I gave her tea and I took leave for going to Office. Though I felt that I am becoming insincere.

I thought to take some medicine for her and I thought to consult my cardiologist friend whether she should be admitted.

As soon as I reached to shop, I had intense feeling of Emptiness. I reached to my Office .

I, she and my youngest daughter Sana doing LL M were living together. She and Sana had some talks. Sana was having her Examination scheduled that day. My wife always had idea of sudden death but I could never fathom it. She was talking to Sana and she said suddenly ‘Call Papa, my condition is deteriorating’.

As soon as I received call from Sana , I returned for home. Here she was lying dead.

I said ‘she has collapsed’ My father and my son were there, they asked me to do something. I gave her mouth to mouth resuscitation. Perhaps she opened her one eye and then gone. I continued this for about 45 minutes praying God for miracle. I wept long with putting my head over her feet. All my thinking has failed me. I was guilty.

In the evening, we buried her.

Same day, her brother was transferred from post of Secretary, Medical Education. At time of theft in 1980, her accepted brother was SSP and at time of her death her real younger brother was Secretary Medical Education. We never tried to be smart in this world. Next morning, just to take my grand daughters Maira and Zoi for outing, I went with them to Rovers. They had gone to shop. I was alone in car. I heard her moaning. Quite incomprehensible.

The sadness continued. We always had impression that she will go first and so I wanted to learn cooking. I started cooking food. Then on August 26,2008 my grand daughter born in my son’s family. The child she wanted was born after her going. Here we were sad for her.

My grand daughter is 3 years old. She says she feels very shy of grandpa(me). She readily goes in lap of my wife’s brother and sister and sometimes refuse to come back to her father or mother. On her 3^rd birthday, she said to my wife’s brother ‘ whenever I call you in my birthday, you come surely’.

I read a story ‘Finding Laurie’ by Michael Schwed available at Authonomy,

where a Jew father re-finds her 4 years old dead daughter Laurie whom he loved very much and always remembered, born as daughter to his second daughter.

Thus Love works wonder....and Love is God.